Mindfulness Meditation Slowing Down
Curated By: Lady Kenyatta Ruth
Dolce far niente is an old Italian saying and means the sweetness of doing nothing or the pleasant laziness or pleasant idleness. Connecting with yourself and your love ones without any expectations, motives or hidden agendas. It’s really not about being lazy but enjoying the moments, and taking time to rest, recharge and rejuvenate. It’s such a delightful and tranquil concept-What’s beautiful about this way of life is that you can espouse (adopt) it no matter where you live or what you do.
But practicing Dolce Far Niente can be easier said than done. This is because sometimes we try to put these expectations on ourselves and others by, planning things to perfection, even if it’s just planning how to do nothing. That’s why it’s essential to choose an activity that suits you and/or those connected to you.
Going on a walk and discovering a new scenic route might be a great idea in theory, but how can you expect yourself to do nothing but live in the moment if heat and insects buzzing will only keep your attention on the atmosphere and your environment instead of remaining calm and carefree while enjoying your saunter (walk) that is? You can go to the gym and walk the treadmill. Think about it, the amount of money you spend on fast-food or materialism, you can invest in your overall health & wellness. Doing nothing might mean taking a nap or snacking on a chocolate bar laying on your living room floor, admiring its taste. And don’t forget to allow yourself to embrace spontaneous opportunities to do nothing rather than planning them down to the T.
Another thing to consider is that to truly connect with yourselves, your friends and family, and the present moment, you must disconnect from anything that will keep you from doing that. People seem to confuse doing nothing with the action of sitting on a couch staring mindlessly into screens. That is simply not the case. Practicing Dolce Far Niente does mean doing nothing but in ways that serve you and your surroundings, something that is creating a smile on your face as you understand the hidden beauties in life, and bringing back the gumption into your life when you’re done. Practicing Dolce Far Niente does not mean wasting time, or frowning because you’re usually a routined individual, and as a result you experience an adverse effect like your energy is getting sucked out of you, and you can’t control your emotions or thoughts, In the moment’s of Awareness, Mindfulness and Connection.
But perhaps the most crucial factor of practicing the art of doing nothing is to learn how to let go of the guilt that usually comes with it. Be gentle with yourself. This might be difficult when you begin your journey of mastering this practice, but soon you’ll be able to silence that tiny voice in your head constantly pushing you to do something ‘productive’ or add a checkmark to your list of tasks.
Similar to how to choose to do nothing, the action of how to let go of guilt comes down to you. With time you’ll be able to understand how to balance your need to finish chores and tasks along with your need to relax. This might mean scheduling important work in the morning but always giving yourself a long uninterrupted lunch break to sit back, laugh with friends, enjoy good music or delicious food and just do nothing.
Now that you’ve taken quality time to peruse my commentary. You have in fact done something productive thus far, I now challenge you to practice Dolce Far Niente and discover the simple pleasures in life with yourself or perhaps with the ones you love.
So many of us rush through life, treating it as a to-do list. And while we take things off, we hardly take the time to enjoy those small moments of achievement as we’re too busy thinking about the new tasks constantly being added. And in the incidents when we decide to take time off and give ourselves a break, an action that is quite rare, our minds are never still, it’s constantly moving and thinking, continuously planning and plotting the following days, including any future rest days. We ultimately race through life, engulfed by guilt on the days we did not take anything off from our lists. We place ourselves in an utterly miserable disposition Thinking we’re damed if we do & damed if we don’t…
Again Begin to Be Gentle With Yourself!!!
BENEFITS OF DOLCE FAR NIENTE
NO GUILT
In the movie (based on the book) Eat Pray Love, there is a phenomenal scene that explains our guilt that could rise up in this situation. And it explains it better than us Americans ever could, you can see the clip of that scene here. But briefly: You feel guilty because you don’t know how to enjoy yourself! You work too hard, you get burned-out- than you come home and spend the whole weekend in your pajamas in front of your TV! But you don’t know pleasure! You have to be told you earned it and Italian doesn’t have to be told. He walks by the sign that says “You Deserve A Break Today”. And he says “Yes I know! That’s why I’m taking the break this afternoon!
BEST TO BE AVOIDED
Except for the guilt we should also say no to the TV, social media, phone, podcasts… Or anything that has a purpose of improvement of oneself.
Why, you ask?
Well, because when we do our little dolce far niente session- everything is already perfect and it doesn’t need improvement or external stimulation. I know, it’s so much easier to play the favorite TV-show on Netflix and get lost in it than to sit with all our thoughts and feelings. But I promise you, if you give yourself little time to get used to it… It will become a second nature and reveal to you a bliss you didn’t know existed. I practice this daily and the effects are very rewarding for my mental, physical, emotional, psychological and overall health in general.
TAKE THE DAY OFF
Not withstanding, I mean a seriously reeeaal day off. Not just a regular-degular ordinary day to do all your chores and finish your side-hustle projects. And run yourself into the ground. I understand, you got to do the laundry, and the dishes, and the groceries and the… We all have to. But we also have to rest, restore, recharge, have fun AND be bored for a second or two. And trust me, not everything has to be clean and tidy in order for that to happen. If the whole day seems impossible- it could be an afternoon or evening or as simple as taking one hour for yourself in the morning to relax before everyone else is up.
I DISCOVERED
Laying on my mat at the park, that when doing nothing- it’s easier to do it outside, or by the window that has a view of the sky. Starring at it works as a natural sedative. Walking on the lake front. Anything dealing with nature is healing and sedating.
BOOK & NAP
Or reading a book Or taking a nap, whichever you prefer. I love & now need my daily one hour naps. I believe it’s safe to say that “ My husband will agree that it’s my medicine and my Dolce Far Ninete.” It heals me holistically. “OMG” That feeling when you are reading something and your eyes get heavy and then… You let yourself go and drift away into a warm nap. I mean, is there anything more relaxing and luxurious than that?
JUST BE
Unlike meditation where we aim for the higher state of awareness in the present moment, when we are just “chilling”- we allow our mind to wander around and daydream. Jump from one idea to the next and back again. This act turns out to be a very healthy habit by the way. And when done correctly, meaning in a positive way (and not mentally watching the worst scenarios over and over and over), it enhances our creativity and problem solving. So, in conclusion, the more we rest- the more we have done… in a way.
IT COULD LOOK LIKE…
After All If You Don’t Take Care Of Yourself First And Foremost. You’re No Good To Take Responsibility and Care For Someone Else!!!
And That’s A Fact Jack!!!
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